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 Post subject: Christmas Compost Humor
PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 9:39 am 
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Joined: Sat Feb 28, 2009 8:35 am
Posts: 102
Happy Holiday Composting from Texas Worm Ranch:
with apologies to Clement Moore.

'Twas the night after Christmas, when in the garage of the house,
Thousands of creatures were stirring, and we are not talking about a mouse;
The peelings and cores were put in the worm bins with care,
In hopes that spring gardening soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of home grown tomatoes danced in their heads;
And Dad slept soundly, but I not a scrap,
Planning my garden’s awakening from a long winter's nap,

In my brain there arose such a clatter,
What was I forgetting, what was the matter?
Away to the computer I flew like a flash,
Tore open Windows98 and threw up the sash.

I needed to think of the ones I should thank, you know...
The people above and the worms down below,
I put on my rubber gloves and what did appear,
I lifted the lids to the worms’ holiday cheer,

They were eating away, so lively and quick,
making worm compost as fast as you can say St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles these wormies they ate,
So I whistled, and shouted, and said that’s great;

"Now, Hermie! now, Squirmy! now, Gobbler and Wiggles!
On, Vermie! On Red! on, Chomper and Squiggles!
To the top of the pumpkin! to the shredded papers from the mall!
Now eat away! eat away! eat away all!"

The rest of this winter time will fly,
Soon we’ll be planting potatoes and thinking of summer quiche pie,
Keep eating, keep eating and make lots of poo,
We need vermicompost for planting, and Worm Wine â„¢ too.

The spring rains will come and powdery mildew too,
along with the lawn brown patch that needs our special brew.
Our friends need us to put beneficial microbes in the ground,
To bring back living soil, where none had been found.

We’ll be planting onions and squash and basil galore,
and when it comes to tomatoes, we always say “more!”;
There will be sweet potatoes, cucumber and okra 12 foot tall,
And we’ll plant some pumpkins to be ready for fall.

When I think of the strawberries, and how fondue will be merry!
Those 200 garlic bulbs, in June will be smelly!
The gardens veggies are great, but I must give a bow,
Texas Worm Ranch would like to take a minute and thank you now;

A Big THANK YOU to Highlands Cafe,
Who gave us their produce scraps and removed them from the waste stream highway;
To our friends who bought worms and have filled their belly,
We thank you too, for helping the world be less smelly.

We hope they are chubby and plump, and if you ever need help,
Just give us a call, an email or yelp!;
To our Worm Wine â„¢ users, may you have big cabbage and broccoli heads,
With Worm Wine to help, you have nothing to dread;

Plant your seeds and transplants with a little vermicompost,
As they mature, give them Worm Wine to make the most,
To all our friends who are organic, sustainable and those,
Who try to keep our earth green, I send a virtual, organic rose;

I won’t forget the bees, the hummingbirds as they whistle
And the graceful butterflies that need some thistle.
Teach our children these lessons, they are the reason!

"Most of all, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year to all, and to all a good gardening season!"
Thanks from Texas Worm Ranch
Heather Rinaldi, Rancher


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